“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to bloom.”
~ Anais Nin
Isn’t this a great quote? Doesn’t it wake you up to how you might be living and how you want to be living?
To be fully in bloom is to offer your gorgeous, radiant self to everyone and everything.
So why is it that we sometimes close up and remain tight, hiding our beauty? Is it possible we forgot how delicious, sensual, blissful, and juicy life can be when we are open to it?
If you are like most women – thirsty to prove your worth – as you stepped into the adult world you broadened your shoulders while piling on the responsibility. You closed off your open spirit and let playtime fly out the door. Life became robotic and yet on some level you know your feminine soul wilted. Consequently you feel out of sorts when it comes to expressing your radiance and allowing your petals to unfold.
The solution? Get out of your head and into your heart. Connect to that space and memory of what brings you joy and passion. Embrace and love yourself as the beautiful woman you are. When you take the time to do this for yourself you will live in a state of peace and joy while sharing your beauty and gifts with the world effortlessly.
So….will you give yourself permission to bloom into the beautiful being you were born to be?
In order to flourish you MUST love yourself, inside and out!
One of the quickest ways to open up and bloom is to fall in love with your body…that’s right – every square inch of it – bulging belly’s, uncontrolled curves and dimpled thighs.
Start by standing in front of a mirror by candlelight, pour yourself a glass of wine if needed and put on some nurturing tunes. Send love to every inch of your body. Thank your thighs for allowing you to walk every day, thank your hips for expanding to allow those beautiful babes into the world and/or giving you that sassy saunter, and thank your stomach for reminding you that we live in a country of plenty. How lucky are we?
Be grateful! When you start to appreciate your body you will start to feel more comfortable in your skin and with this comes peace and with this comes the burgeoning of your radiant beauty.
When you live in this space of truly loving your body, you emanate a vibe that is irresistible to men. You will attract men like bees to a flower in full bloom.
In order to blossom, you must say, “yes” to self-love and playtime. Take steps each day to connect with your heart and your true beauty. With each step you’ll feel your petals unfold leaving behind the tight bud and exposing your gorgeous glory.
Join me in a making a commitment to choose happiness this year – no matter what!
We are entering into a new year and for most people it’s a time of setting goals and resolutions. Have you started that process?
Wherever you are with your plans for the New Year, I want to shake things up for you. I want you to step outside of your box and experience the exhilaration of living on the edge of your own comfort zone.
You see, making 2014 your best year requires more than just setting resolutions and intentions. It involves personal transformation by setting and achieving goals that matter MOST.
Living your BEST year involves a commitment to a way of being. It’s realizing that life is full of choices and that we are each empowered to make choices that bring us the most joy, the most growth and the most fulfillment.
Click here to read the full blog and discover 3 powerful steps to creating your best year ever!
‘Tis the season of holiday gifts wrapped under the tree but the gift I wish most for you is the greatest gift of all… self-love.
Self-love forms the basis of your single, most important relationship – that with yourself. The strength of all your other relationships is exactly equal to the strength of that groundwork. To love yourself is the prerequisite to healthy self-esteem and deeply connected relationships.
It is to be willing to receive as much as you are willing to give and do both equally. Self-love is about knowing your value, setting your boundaries, and honoring yourself. It is about teaching others how to treat you by demonstration of self-love. It is about being kind to yourself. It is about looking after your mind, your body and your spirit; all three. It is about knowing you are worth it, not because of what you have achieved or what you do for others, but because love is your birthright no matter what.
So the question is, are you practicing self-love on a daily basis to honor all that you are?
Follow these 7 steps to fall head over heels in love with YOU:
1) Write yourself a love letter.
Commit it to paper and really gush! You are digging for your diamonds here so get out your pick, put on your mining hard hat and start excavating. If this is hard for you or you draw a blank ask a good friend or family member to help you discover your dazzle.
2) Combat the critics.
Ah yes, the stealth committee of your mind—always at your service to run you over the coals. When they show up en force simply say, “Thank you for sharing, but no thanks! I choose to live with brilliance not bullying.”
3) Speak your truth – at all times, no matter what.
Express yourself with honesty and integrity. Even if you think the conversation will be hard, speaker your truth and come from love. This honors who you are as well as the recipient.
4) Practice self-care.
Listen to your body and take care of your needs! Eat when you’re hungry, sleep when you’re tired, get a massage, indulge in a mani pedi, exercise, and kick any destructive habits/addictions like alcohol, drugs, and food abuse. You may need a village to help you and that’s okay. Don’t be afraid to reach out—you are worth it! There is plenty of support waiting to help you shine.
5) Accept yourself—no matter what.
Self love must come from a place of acceptance and appreciation. Regardless of your race, color, height, weight or gender, just accept the facts. You cannot change these things. If you don’t accept them you will cripple yourself—let go of what you cannot change and choose to celebrate instead.
6 ) Find evidence that supports how wonderful you are!
Every day you are going to be faced with situations that challenge your state of being, but when you understand that your heart inherently holds the blueprint for love, joy and happiness and all you have to do is tune in you’ll discover you’re not so burdened when things go awry. And ultimately, when you fall in love with YOU, the world will too!
7) Celebrate your accomplishments!!
Go ahead, toot your own horn! Toast your accomplishments with a friend or your partner over drinks. Buy yourself flowers, treat yourself to a massage – do something to make a big deal of what you’ve done. I just had this conversation with a client of mine – when you minimize your winnings that’s sending a message that you aren’t grateful for these gifts. It’s also not very loving to yourself – you’ve worked hard so take time to high five yourself instead of being the tyrannical task master!
Follow these tips, learn to love yourself and you’ll appreciate the greatest love of all. Plus, watch as the world responds in wonderful, dreamy ways! xo
Have you unknowingly closed off your heart creating a barricade against love?
We all want to experience true connected love. Being in a healthy, loving relationship is a rewarding and fulfilling life experience. But sometimes, without even realizing it, women can close off their heart and block out love.
How does this happen?
To find out how you may be unconsciously blocking love and to learn powerful secrets to remove your blocks and invite love in… read the full article here.
Here’s the science behind happiness & attraction plus 4 steps to increase your happiness.
It may come as a surprise to learn that the #1 thing that attracts quality men is a happy woman. Happiness is a characteristic that men say is alluring over any other physical trait.
When we feel happy and love ourselves, men and others love us. It’s a great equation where self love and happiness equal attraction and love from others.
Here’s how this equation looks:
Self love + happiness = alluring attraction and love from others
This healthy self-esteem and happiness becomes a magnet for positive life experiences and connected relationships. The embodiment of self-love and happiness creates the kind of fulfilling life that women want.
Great stuff, right!?
So, what’s the secret to happiness?
The secret to happiness was revealed to me in a presentation by Dr. Henry Cloud. In his talk, he shared an interesting and scientifically proven fact: we all have a happiness set point. It’s our default level of happiness.
According to Dr. Cloud only 10% of our happiness comes from anything circumstantial (job promotion, marriage, baby, winning the lottery, etc.). While you may get an initial surge of joy from an external circumstance, after time, it goes back down to your set point.
Aha!…That explains a lot!
Dr. Cloud went on to reveal that there are action steps that we can take to raise our happiness set point so that we can increase our joy and maintain a high caliber of happiness and fulfillment.
Here are 4 action steps you can take to increase your happiness set point:
1) Connect with others from your heart and soul.
2) Give without an agenda. Give with joy.
3) Set goals. Goals give us purpose and fulfillment.
4) Appreciation. Develop an attitude of gratitude.
Simple, yet powerful.
Start taking action! Choose one of the 4 items above that you can take action on today to raise your happiness set point and watch your day unfold in a more joyful way.
You are meant to shine with happiness and enjoy a fulfilling love-filled life.
Here’s to raising your happiness set point and increasing your attraction!
Do you ever feel like you’re stuck? Like you’re in a rut and you don’t know how to get out? Life feels stalled. All those big hopes and dreams you once had for yourself seem like they’re on a distant horizon.
It’s one of the most common themes that I hear from clients and it can be very frustrating.
In your current situation, do you think, “What’s going on is NOT ok, this isn’t what I signed up for and not what I was expecting” or, “This is not how I want to spend my time”?
If you’ve been feeling this way, or have ever felt boxed-in, and you want to learn how to get out of a rut so you can take action, click here to read more.
Are you working to exhaustion, giving too much of yourself to everyone and everything? Do you have a hard time letting other people do things for you?
If so, you may be in danger of doing too much.
Many women are so busy juggling multiple roles and wearing different hats that they forget to just BE. They lose sight of the inherent value they posses in being themselves and assign value only to the things they do for others.
For many of my coaching clients, the act of self-care is a foreign notion. In fact, most women feel guilty about doing things for themselves. Women often feel selfish for taking time out for self-care. Yet, self-nurturing is critical for health and well-being!
Women especially have difficulty setting aside the needs of others in order to take care of their own needs. We’ll often marginalize our own desires and passions while placing higher priority on the demands of others. Our kids, partners, siblings, friends, and co-workers will receive support and nurture while little is left for self-maintenance. When this happens, we feel depleted and the cycle of giving and receiving is disrupted creating disharmony.
Each week, women who are exhausted and overwhelmed from doing too much come to me for coaching on how to rejuvenate and regain balance. One of the most important things they learn is how to fill up their own cup. Once you fill yourself up, you have more to give and are able to give from an authentic place rather than giving until you are depleted.
If you’ve been doing too much, it’s time to create some new boundaries and set a new priority for self-care.
Only you can choose to stop doing too much. Self-care is a choice you must make for yourself in order to achieve optimum health and true well-being.
If you find you are struggling with this, I want to support you. Use this link to schedule a complimentary 30 minute strategy session. You deserve to take care of yourself and live a life you love!
Many women share that when they get in a relationship they lose themselves. Relationships are demanding and filling the role of wife and/or mother can be an all-consuming job. In satisfying the wants and needs of your loved ones, have you lost yourself?
Click here to watch this video and learn how to love without losing yourself.
If you want to move on from a relationship but are finding it hard to do so you are probably intertwined with your ex in ways you don’t even realize are preventing you from doing so. The following is an article I was asked to participate in by YourTango bringing to light ten hidden ways we stay connected with our ex’s. I wanted to share them with you so you can free yourself from the trappings of an old relationship. Read your way to freedom!!….
IT’S official. It’s over. Actually it’s been over for quite some time now. Then why are you still stuck with your ex? You may think you’re doing your best to move on, but somehow you just can’t shimmy away from him/her. Truth be told even if you aren’t in physical contact you may be fooling yourself with lots of sneaky subtle behaviors that keep you connected and prevent you from meeting someone new!
Breaking up can be hard to do. We may be bonded to the other person and have a hard time letting go. Not having a clean break, however, may be confusing for either party. Keeping what seem to be innocent connections may send the signal that you want to get back together or they stand in the way of making a future connection with someone new.
Here are 10 ways you may be sabotaging your freedom:
1) Saving old messages — Are you saving and rereading past texts or listening to old phone messages? Reliving the past can take you down the rabbit hole fast. You’ll start the whole vicious cycle of wondering where it all went wrong — blaming yourself, then your ex, then you again, totally enmeshed in a relationship that’s over. Time to delete, delete, delete!
2) Socializing with his/her loved ones — Do you stay in contact with your ex’s family and friends? Are you secretly hoping they’ll put in a good word for you, or make him/her realize what a fool he/she was for leaving you. You’ll find this tactic will backfire on you because any communication you have with them after the break-up just keeps him/her alive in your mind and heart. Unless there are children involved, do yourself a favor, and let go of those ties.
3) You have co-mingled accounts — I’ve not only heard clients say this, at one point I even said it myself: “Oh, it doesn’t really matter that we aren’t legally divorced yet — we both know we’re done and have moved on.” Wrong. It does matter. It’s closure on another level, one that officially marks an end to one part of your life and endorses a new beginning.
Make the time, do the paperwork, get legally divorced. Believe me, you will feel different when you hold those papers in your hand. It may have made financial sense to be on the same calling plan when you were a couple, but saving $35 per month isn’t financial saavy, it’s a way to keep connection with your ex.
We’re financially bound. Shared mortgages, joint debts and investments, income tax return and vehicle payments — having the ex involved in financial matters keeps his/her presence alive in your mind and life. Worst still, things could turn stressful if he doesn’t do his part in meeting financial obligations. Take the steps now to divide and clean up the mess as best as possible; autonomy means financial autonomy, too.
4) Asking for advice or help — If the only person you can think of to solve a problem or move a heavy box is your ex, you may be looking for ways to stay connected. Google is a modern day miracle for answers to even the most complex problems, and if a box is heavy or furniture needs to be moved, there are other people who could help.
5) Keeping old photos — Do you still have pictures of the two of you displayed in your home or on your computer screensaver? Pictures stimulate desire and tug at your heart, causing you to reminisce about what was and could have been. They may cause you to weaken and reach out or keep you emotionally tied to the past. If you want to move forward, get rid of them pronto!
Put down the celery and strap on some stilettos!
Fortunately, sex appeal isn’t all about weight. Ladies here’s an article Your Tango asked me and a few other experts to contribute to giving suggestions about how you can feel irresistible at any dress size, and here’s what we had to say:
1) Wear your best color. The right color for you makes you look vibrant, happy and beautiful. It might not be your favorite color, so find out by standing in front of a mirror and holding different fabrics near your face. Then, you will see stunning effects! When in doubt, trust the Chinese medicine tradition: pinks, reds and oranges regulate joy and harmony.
2) Follow your passion. Nothing is more irresistible than someone who believes strongly in a worthy cause and devotes her time and energy to it. If you love animals, check out your local animal shelter for volunteer opportunities, or, if your passion is to help those in need, spend a few hours per week at a local soup kitchen. Your sense of fulfillment is a vehicle for personal growth that will also up your level of irresistibility.
3) Be interested. Who doesn’t love to talk about themselves? Take the advice of Dale Carnegie and get into the habit of being on the receiving end by developing your listening skills and showing a genuine curiosity in what your partner has to say. When they trust that they’ll be heard, understood, supported and maybe even challenged by your questions, they’ll naturally want to spend time in your company.
4) Make no excuses. Accept who you are, as you are. Whether or not you hope or plan to lose weight, this is where you are right now in your life. If you want to live feeling whole, empowered and fulfilled, then you need to focus only on what you want, not what you don’t want, or don’t have or wish was different. Focus only on that which you can do, and then whether or not what you are doing is moving you in a positive direction. A positive, clear outlook on yourself and your life will do more toward making you attractive than any diet.
5) Be playful.
Opening up to playfulness frees the creative expression of your soul and brings to life your charisma, magnetic charm and vibrancy. Unleashing your fun, feminine spirit gives you that glow that money can’t buy, making your attraction factor larger than life!
6) Get out and move. Besides burning calories, getting out in nature for a hike or a walk in your neighborhood will increase your heart rate and blood flow which will give your skin a rosy hue and improve your mood. Nobody can resist a bright smile backed by a glowing complexion and positive energy!