I want you to pretend that we’re hanging out together at our favorite coffee shop. We’ve got our latte’s in front of us and I’m sitting across the table from you when and I look up and say, “Girl, you are overdue for some pampering ‘me’ time!”
I stand up, take your hand and proclaim that today is all about you. We’re going to create a space for you to refuel, recharge and treat yourself like the amazing woman you are!
We go to our favorite bath and body store. You buy some bath oils, a luxurious new robe and maybe those little things they put between your toes when you get a pedicure. Yes! We’re going all out for your much-needed self-love at home SPA DAY!
How is this sounding so far? Pretty good, right?
But now, let’s imagine that I’m not there with you, encouraging you to take care of yourself. How likely do you think you are to actually do it? I’m thinking the answer to that question is, “Not very likely.” Let’s change that!
Self-Love fuels the soul.
It really is that simple. When we make ourselves a priority, we can more easily make others feel important as well.
If you have difficulty putting yourself first, here are some Self-Love Day suggestions that will fill you up and make you sparkle.
- Write yourself a love letter! Describe everything that you love and find amazing about yourself. Tell yourself how proud you are of all that you’ve accomplished. Make it fun by using your favorite pen and some pretty paper. If any negative speak comes into your head, physically flick it away from your body and keep writing!
- Make a homemade sugar body scrub. Mix together honey and raw sugar and rub this on your body while in the shower. As you brush away all the dead skin, imagine that you’re also brushing away all the negativity that has been clinging to you, making it difficult to feel lovable and open. Doing this will make you feel fresh, polished and pretty.
- Have an “I Love You” bath or shower. Get a white soap like Dove and work it into a lather all over your body. You should be able to ‘write’ on your body and see it. Write “I love you” on your arm, and say out loud “I love you, arm, you help me hold the hand of my partner,” or “you helped me cradle my children.” Praise that body part for all it allows you to do. Do the same to your breasts, belly, your legs, even your bottom! When you’re done praising every body part, lovingly wash off the soap. You will feel so much love for your body.
- Give your hair a loving treatment! Wet your hair and rub several tablespoons of Coconut oil into your hair and scalp. Then wrap it in an old towel and let it sit for a few hours. While you’re waiting, get back into that juicy book you never finished or watch a movie. Wash your hair as you normally would. It will feel silky and nourished!
- Give yourself a mani or pedi or both! You can buy DIY kits at most drugstores. Paint your nails a bright SELF LOVE pink and every time you look at your handiwork, you will feel that love!
Try to make time for one of these Self-Love Days at least once a month. It doesn’t take much effort to create one and there are no rules. Do anything that resonates with you and makes you feel good.
The words we speak to ourselves are very powerful!
Dr. Masaru Emoto’s studies show that the way we speak to ourselves carries its own energetic weight. In one of his experiments, there were two glasses of water drawn from an identical water source. On each glass were written words. One glass had positive messages and the other, negative. The water was left to sit for a while and later viewed under a microscope.
What they discovered is astounding!!
The molecules of water in the glass with positive words looked like snowflakes. They reflected like beautiful prisms. The water molecules in the glass with negative words were shockingly black and yellow. They looked horrible.
So on your Self-Love Day make sure that you’re using only words of love.
Let’s share our Self-Love days! What do you have planned to let yourself know how much you care?
Valentines greetings from Egypt – while I’m on a spiritual pilgrimage to deepen my own personal journey of expansion, growth and self love you were on my mind.
Tomorrow, as you know, is the most exalted love day of the month.
How are you doing?
If you are already in a wonderful relationship I’m wishing you a beautiful celebration:)) But if you’re not and you find yourself longing to be in a deeply loving and connected partnership you are in great company. In my experience as a coach, I’ve learned that the majority of women share this common desire.
We are all on this planet to love and be loved.
And we’ve all been there on Valentine’s Day. The one day of the year that makes being alone feel even harder. Every shop window is full of hearts and red roses. Restaurants are advertising their special Valentine’s Day menus. If you were in a relationship last year and this year you’re not, the day can become a difficult reminder of what’s missing from your life.
But it doesn’t have to be this way!
Let’s face it: most long-term couples find themselves in a romantic rut at one point or another. Between your kids’ busy schedules, your demanding jobs, and that never-ending and totally unsexy daily task list, it’s hard enough just to sit down and have a conversation, let alone make time for romance.
For some women, the problem is bigger than a lack of fun in the bedroom. They wish for a deeper sense of emotional intimacy and connection with their husbands. They think back to the early days of their courtship, to their lost sense of play and spontaneity and wonder if it’s possible to ever get that back.
I’ve got good news for you. It is absolutely possible to rekindle your sense of passion for each other!
All it takes is a willingness to try something new and spice things up! Are you game? Why not try a Romance-Capade? So what’s that you might ask? It’s a themed rendezvous meant to bring connection, fun and intimacy into your relationship.
You can follow any of the 15 presented in my book OR let your imagination go wild and create your own. With a little prep work and a spirit of fun, you’ll have a great time planning your sexy escapade.
One of my clients decided to do the Moroccan themed Romance-Capade for her husband’s birthday. Believe me when I tell you that she’d never imagined herself belly-dancing after 40 years of marriage!
She ended up having so much fun buying props and planning the evening. He loved it and she felt invigorated and empowered by the whole experience.
Here’s the deal: that guy you fell in love with, the one who gave you butterflies simply by looking in your direction, he’s still in there! And he wants to come out and play just as much as you do!
Like my client, mix things up with a little moxy and create a romantic evening that brings you and your partner back to those heady days of dating. Make his favorite dinner and eat it by candlelight. Create a playlist of songs from that time in your life and you’ll be sure to remember why you fell in love in the first place.
Here are some idea’s to get you started….
Fill your bathroom with candles and draw a luxurious bath for the two of you. Or bring the balmy, romantic nights of Hawaii to your home with a sexy hula show.
Feeling extra adventurous? Book yourself a room at a nearby hotel. Have your husband meet you at the bar and send him a drink with a note attached that reads, “I saw you on the subway this morning and I have to have you…meet me in room #…in ten minutes.”
With Valentine’s Day right around the corner, empower yourself by doing something different. If you want a little creative step-by-step help you can grab a copy of my book Sexy and Sparkling After 40. In the second section, Passport to Passion, you’ll discover more than a dozen exciting Romance-Capades, themed adventures created for women who want to spice up their love lives and deepen intimacy with their partners.
I first presented Romance-Capades in product form at a romance party years ago. As the women crowded around the table, I could tell that, while intrigued, they were also a bit unsure about how to put these teasing trysts into action. Some of them were downright scared!
You might be feeling a bit insecure or unsure too – that is normal, know that you’re not alone.
But know this, your guy isn’t looking at what you consider to be imperfections. He’s admiring and appreciating you for being adventurous and playful. And he’s feeling hot and bothered knowing that there’s a big time “win” for him at the end of this sexy story.
But, if you think you might be so nervous you won’t be able to go through with it, try one of these tips:
- Ask one of your girlfriends to be on standby for a last-minute supportive phone call or text message.
- Give yourself a heartfelt pep talk.
- Get some exercise.
- Reminisce by going through photo albums and remembering all the happy times.
- Do a meditation/visualization just before he arrives.
- When all else fails breathe and open up to your feminine nature. Getting started is the hardest part. Once you’ve jumped in, you’ll be thrilled to see how much fun you can have creating the experience.
This Valentine’s Day, put your favorite Romance-Capade into action. Don’t wait for your man to make dinner reservations. Take the lead and you will feel enlivened, vibrant and empowered!
As we head into the month of love there is a promise, a hope a thought… this year is gonna be different. I’ve spoken to so many of you in the Sparkle Community who’ve said, “This is my year for love – I desire and deserve it!”
Yes you do, you ABSOLUTELY deserve to experience great love and the time has never been better than today – so draw an invisible line, step over it and claim it victoriously!
Whether you’re single or in a committed relationship it’s time to take bold action moving you towards your dream. If you are single I always say there’s a lid for every pot and if you have a lid you may want to improve the fit. Regardless make a decision for your dream.
Hmmmm…are you beginning to notice any anxiety rising up? Twitching. Starting to sweat. Are you hearing yourself blurt out, “Not so fast!. As much as I want that, it’s a little bit scary. I don’t know if I can trust again…I’m not sure I’m ready to open my heart again…but dang I really want it!
Does that sound familiar?
If that speaks to you in any way, and you’re ready to let your desires run roughshod over your fears then listen up! (And by the way, I’ve been there, too – I know what it’s like to have painful doubts that keep you from the amazing life you know in your heart can be yours).
That’s why I’m writing to you today. Because all those doubts are about to disappear… forever. Click the video below to learn how….
It’s my easy-to-implement “3 STEPS to make it safe to love again” video. I created it especially for you, because I’ve been where you are.
And I know that deep down you are longing to experience a love like no other.
By the time we’re done, you will have a key tool to succeed.
To set you free and help you feel safe to love again.
And steer you in the direction of the love you’ve missed out on all your life.
Now is your time! Leave behind the doubt, fear and paralysis that’s kept you hiding. A romantic adventurous and fulfilling love life is waiting for you!
What are you committed to?
Not many people would say they are committed to a life that sabotages them yet their desires and dreams always seem to be just out of reach.
What about YOU?
Because the truth is, everyone is committed to something. When you think about your goals for the year in relationship to your daily life – would you say you are taking actions consistently that are moving you towards your vision? If you are that’s awesome!! If, however, your pattern is taking a step forward and then right when you think you are making progress something pops up and before you know it you are off track and feel like you’ve taken a step backward – maybe feeling frustrated and disappointed with yourself – you are not alone. Can you relate?
Because I know EXACTLY how you feel, and what steps help me to successfully and consistently move forward, I created a video to share them with you.
CLICK the video below to discover 3 easy steps to manifest your dreams and strengthen your commitments!
“How To Make A Positive Commitment” to you!
To your sparkling dreams coming true!
Did you know just 8% of people achieve their New Year’s resolutions?
Shocking, isn’t it?
That’s why I am dedicating this month to YOUR success! With the right steps and tools you can do it!! YES!!
Why are the right tools important? Because the research of Scranton University says despite our good intentions only a tiny fraction of us keep our resolutions.
I believe it – before learning how to set goals successfully I was in that 92% where goals fell by the wayside within the first month.
What about you? How are you doing with your New Year’s goals? Are you easily staying on track or are you finding distractions derailing you?
If you find yourself in the latter you’re not alone and you’ll love today’s tool to help you stay connected to your desire. (If you missed week 1 and 2’s steps you can go here to learn more)
Last week we talked about setting yourself up for success in 2018 with a 5-step process. I gave you the first step, clarity of your dream, and the components to craft a great vision. Have you done that yet? (If you want to learn all 5 NOW go here!)
Let’s assume you have. Ok then! You’ve got a dream, a goal, ambition and you’re ready to take the world by storm. Woo hoo!
But, wait, why are there so many darn potholes on the road to your desires?
Anyone who’s dared to dream knows that the initial excitement will eventually be met with some form of obstacle or resistance. So, how do you move past these roadblocks on the path to your bright future?
The first step is to recognize that a roadblock is not a dead end.
When a challenge arises, it’s important to stay connected to your “why” and not to give up. Why do you want this particular thing? As long as you keep this in the forefront of your mind you can recenter, refocus and recommit.
After all, a detour on the way to work wouldn’t keep you from getting to your end destination. So why would you let a detour on the path to your dream keep you from reaching your aspirations?
Today I’m going to share the 3 most common obstacles people encounter on the way to their dream and how to recognize these culprits and move past them.
This way, when you encounter an obstacle you can say, “Out of my way! I’m on course for my dream life!“
Viva la dream building!
The 3 Biggest Obstacles to Achieving Your Dream & 3 Solutions
Obstacle #1 – Fear
Fear, doubt, and worry are like leeches to your dream. There is a part of you that wants to move forward and there’s a part of you that doesn’t. The part of you that doesn’t is fearful of change. It will tell you all the reasons why you can’t reach your goal like, “you’re too old, you don’t know enough, you don’t have the money, you don’t have what it takes, you failed before what makes you think you can succeed this time?” Its job is to protect you in a safe little cocoon and therefore it will resist any form of growth and expansion in your life.
Solution #1 – Neutralize your fear
When you feel fear and anxiety creeping up, you’ll need to step out of that thought pattern. Take a deep breath and begin to focus on the “why” of your dream. Why is it that this dream important to you? When your “why” is big enough, the how will appear.
Ask yourself, what’s one step you can take from where you are right now, with what you have, to move towards your goal?
Your dream/vision will unfold one step at a time. Even the longest journey begins with just one step. What one step can you take now?
Obstacle #2 – Distraction
Distractions can keep you stuck in a rut. Have you ever set time aside for a project but before you sit down you look around and there’s the laundry or there’s a pile of mail you haven’t gone thru? Then you notice there’s that drawer you wanted to clean out, or you get a call from a friend and instead of letting it go to voice mail you pick up and spend an hour chitchatting with her, or you check your email and texts or get on Facebook?
These distractions can keep you on a permanent detour from getting to your dream!
Solution #2 – Stay focused & Set boundaries
Achieving your dream is going to require focus and effort. Set aside time regularly to work toward your aspirations. Treat this time as a VIP priority. Make sure you turn off all distractions. Put your phone on silent and close your email application.
Think of distractions as your archenemy in the field of your dreams.
Remember the importance of achieving your goal as you create your vision. If any distractions start to pop up, remember what they are and that you can make a choice of how to deal with them.
Obstacle #3 – Your habitual patterns keep you stuck
Most people want a life that’s warm, fuzzy and filled with fulfillment. Yet we go through life blaming our circumstances for the life we have rather than taking ownership and leading ourselves to a more empowered life. The truth is we all have circumstances, the trick is not to let the circumstances have us. Whether we are stuck in the past, seeing nothing at all ahead, or envisioning a dazzling future– all are equal in producing our reality. If we are dissatisfied yet do nothing to change, we will continue to live a mediocre life at best.
Solution #3 – Get in the driver’s seat and take control
Take responsibility for creating the life you want. You are the leading lady of your own life. Do the work to “know” what you want and “choose” those things. You have the power to create a life you love. It’s always a choice. You can move out of victim mentality, out of feeling stuck, and out of being irresponsible for life’s outcomes. You can choose to move into responsibility, possibilities, personal power and limitless opportunities.
It’s time to get in the driver’s seat and take control of your destination. You must identify and harness the power, control and responsibility for your thoughts and actions so you can be empowered to create a life you love.
Here’s to staying on track on the path to your dream. You CAN do it! I believe in you. Happy visioning!
Yay it’s a brand new year! Fresh start. Big possibilities. Let’s dream!!
Do you have a clear vision of 2018?
Could you describe it in detail right now or is it a bit fuzzy?
This month we’re going to be focusing on your most sparkling blueprint for the coming year – that means you’ll get a weekly article in the Sparkle community AND you’ll have the opportunity to be on a weekly call I’m hosting to help you soar into 2018!!!
If you are like most people, you see bits and pieces of what you want to happen or you might be afraid to dream for fear of being disappointed, so it’s still a blank canvas.
Regardless, know that you can have the love-filled, exciting, happy life you desire. All you have to do is get very specific about what you want and stay connected to that vision every day and voila you are making welcome the life you would love.
So, let’s get you crystal clear!!
Wow, are we really in the “nth” hour of 2017? Can you believe it??
You may have had a really tough year and are looking forward to saying sayyyy-onnnn-ara!!!. That’s probably true for many people. On the other hand, there is no doubt you’ve had some real gem moments that may need to be mined from the last year.
Whether you’ve had high times or low times, there is some great wisdom to be had in all of it… if you know how to look for it.
Something I like to do at the end of the year is a “real” reflection because if you are anything like me, there is a tendency to focus on what didn’t get done. Right? Mama mia that can take you right down the rabbit hole!
So today I’m sharing this year end tradition with you; it’s perfect to do right now before you get caught up in all the holiday glitz and blitz.
This tradition I started several years ago is not only easy and fun, it helps you see all the good things that happened; clear the chaos and clutter to GET the lesson, and sets you up for a spectacular and exciting New Year.
What I’m talking about involves 3 simple questions.
- What did I accomplish this year? Get your planner out and spend 15 minutes looking back to remind yourself of all your wins! This includes both emotional and physical accomplishments. Maybe you stood up to your mother and set a boundary, or made a choice to eat healthy foods that nourish and make you feel energized. Maybe you ran a 10K or realized what love really means or volunteered your time. Look at every little thing that moved you forward. Write it down with pride! Make this a fun poster that makes your heart smile by using colorful glitter glue and rhinestone stickers. Celebrate YOU!
- What am I leaving behind? Look at lessons learned and ways of being that you are ready to release. Maybe you were overly responsible and now you are going to let go of fixing everyone else’s problems. Or perhaps you are a woman of independence and you are going to let go of doing everything yourself and ask, dare I say it, for help! It could be you had unhealthy eating habits and you are going to let go of indulging to fill a void and bring in some new empowering behaviors. Possibly you have a closet full of clothes yet you wear the same 5 outfits over and over again and know it’s time to heave-ho ( yes that includes that little black dress you wore with the one you thought was “the one” and your heart sinks every time you look at it- get it out!). You are becoming the leading lady of your life!!! Hallelujah to that sister!
- What would I love in 2018? Get yourself a calendar, some colorful pens and use your imagination to create a life of passion! Start by thinking of all the things that you would love to do and fill in your calendar for the whole year. Decide when and how many vacations you want to take; how many fun days a month will you give yourself? Are there retreats or training’s you’d like to attend for physical, spiritual or mind blowing expansion? Make sure to include a bucket list item or two or three LOL. Taking control of how you spend your time will create a much more balanced and happy life.
As Margaret Wheatley said, “Without reflection, we go blindly on our way, creating more unintended consequences, and failing to achieve anything useful.”
Answering the above 3 questions will make you feel lighter and as you feel lighter you’ll begin to feel more energized and open. As you feel more energized and open, you’ll step into the New Year with more confidence.
It’s time to make a change! Gather your gumption and give this a go! You’ll be glad you did!
I would love to hear about your reflections!
Leave a comment below and let me know:
1 thing you did this year that you are proud of…
~ or ~
1 thing you are letting go of…
~ or ~
1 fun thing you are adding to your 2018 calendar…
In my last post, I wrote about how choosing to give – whether it’s a physical gift, or simply the gift of your smile, time or attention – can powerfully raise your vibration.
It can be tough to live in a “feel good state” during the holidays, when so many people are actually feeling sad, downtrodden, perhaps lonely or just uninspired. Are you challenged to feel happy with where you are at this time of year?
Today, I’d like to share an exercise with you that will certainly lift your spirits and help shift you into a “I welcome more love into my life” kinda space this holiday season.
Give Back to Others through Gratitude
It’s the end of the year. As 2017 winds down, we’re encouraged to reflect on the last 12 months and consider how our lives are different. Has your life changed in a positive way? Are you happy with where your life is at right now?
I also love to reflect on the people in my life: who has impacted me? Who has been generous and kind with me, and made a difference in my life?
A couple weeks ago I was given an assignment by my mentor to write a thank-you note to somebody who has touched my life. I took on the assignment whole-heartedly, and wrote a letter to an old friend who, back in 1999, said something that changed my life forever.
“Let’s start a business together, Sherri!” were her exact words.
And we did! That simple phrase, and the actions we took after, started me down a life-changing path that has not only taught me so much about myself, but brought me endless joy and fulfillment. I wrote her a thank-you note and mailed it to her. Then I forgot about it.
About a week later I received a phone call from her. She told me what a difference my note had made in HER life that day and how grateful she was to hear from me. What a wonderful gift she gave me in calling me, and we were able to reminisce and celebrate our appreciation of each other!
Give Back Consciously
Years ago, one of my clients was very frustrated in her marriage. Her husband didn’t seem to be emotionally invested, she was frequently angry and disappointed and secretly wondered if the marriage was about to collapse.
Instead of filing for divorce, she decided to shift her thoughts and write a love letter. She wrote about how grateful she was for all the ways he had shown up in their marriage, and she gave him the letter.
What a world of difference! After reading the letter, it was like she had a new husband! They had one of the best nights of their lives: he totally opened up, they had a great dinner together, and finally their hearts were able to reconnect.
In my book, I emphasize that when you give from the heart without any underlying motivation, your diamond power will ignite and light you up from the inside- bringing forth your irresistible charisma. Giving from the heart is the best investment you can make. You will always feel expanded and blissful when you give generously, without an agenda, and you will always find the key to your sparkling radiance in the act of giving.
This week, I present a CHALLENGE to you – I invite you to give back with all your heart. Give just to give. Set aside any fears of exposing yourself or feeling vulnerable or getting rejected… trust the process, and find a way to give to someone you love.
Let me know how it goes in the comments below – choose love!!!!