I was shocked when I read these statistics…and it made me sad. I thought, WOW.. this HAS to change!
Tell me if you agree…
* 75% of women are experiencing chronic stress? Did you know that?
* 1 in 4 women over 40 are on anti-depressants!!!!
That’s a lot of emotional distress happening, stealing your joy, radiance and happiness.
I say the time to change this is NOW! Don’t you agree?
Because the reality is, either you or a woman you know:
- Lacks confidence and has low self-esteem in love
- Feels like something is definitely missing
- Chronically busy – no time for herself
- Living for everyone else and feels lost and/or unappreciated
- Wants to open her heart but is scared to get hurt again
Or maybe you or a woman you know has gone from high functioning to low functioning and feels stuck and frustrated.
When you are in the murky waters of your mind getting unstuck and creating happiness can seem elusive; you can spin your wheels waiting for things to change.
The truth is you DESERVE to sparkle and have a life you love!!!
Which is why, if you can relate to any of the above, I have a solution for you.
Let me tell you about something I know, without a shadow of a doubt, will transform your life – something I’ve given a lot of thought to, keeping you and your needs in the forefront of my mind.
I’ve created an immersive experience for you that will definitely bring your va-va voom back…
Ready to hear my remedy for results?
I’m proud to present the 3rd annual Soul Sparkle Retreat.
This soul-enriching adventure will provide you with the tools and support you need to make REAL CHANGE for lasting results. You will leave feeling like a new woman, totally empowered having released the past and opening your heart. You will also have a practical plan of action for bringing more love and joy into your daily life.
This retreat is highly experiential – you will not be sitting indoors all day learning content (although we do a little of that). The majority of the time you will be transforming through awesome experiences.
Click here to discover what Soul Sparkle will do for you!
If you struggle with doing something nice for yourself, know you are not alone. These women felt just like you and made a decision to stop waiting and take action. Here’s what they had to say about their experience at Soul Sparkle Retreat last year:
“This has been an amazing retreat! I’m leaving with my heart and soul refreshed and ready to expand my life. It exceeded my expectations!” ~ Peggy
“What a very positive, rejuvenating, energizing, inspirational and fulfilling experience! I became clear on how I want to show up in the next chapter of my life. Recently ending a marriage I needed to move through to the other side and leave that life behind. I made the right choice to come to Soul Sparkle Retreat – this is right where I needed to be.” ~ Jane
“Soul Sparkle was a great experience – something I really needed to do to get back to me.”~ K.D.
“I wanted to get out of my comfort zone and I feel I faced old fears and definitely stepped out of my box. This was an excellent experience bringing me growth and awareness and it was fun! Met some awesome women too!” ~ Patty
Here’s why I’m sharing these with you – these women made the choice to put themselves first so they could create a more joyful, fulfilling, love-filled life AND show up with more love for those they love.
So here’s what’s NEXT if you choose:
Soul Sparkle Retreat has only a few spots left – if you are interested in feeling happy, reconnecting and anchoring more solidly into your beautiful, diamond essence, and generally expanding your life with more love, this would be a great next step for you.
Simply click here to fill out a form so I can schedule a time to speak with you and see if this retreat is a good fit for you.
If you feel a longing in your heart, hurry and book a time to chat with me – there are only 2 spots left! Does one belong to you?
Are you like most women, forgetting to take care of you when life is coming at you like a tsunami? It’s easy to live in your head and disconnect from the core essence of YOU when one thing after another is coming at you. When that’s happening do you know how to fill yourself up with your most loving, sensual, playful self?
It’s ok, you can admit it, not many women do. Honestly most women aren’t schooled or mentored in how to do this – we are taught how to make other people happy, how to make money, how to sacrifice our needs and made to feel selfish if we want a more pleasurable life.
In truth you don’t have to change who you are to have what you want. Simply embrace these 7 tips to fill up with your God-given feminine, sensual self. When you make a commitment to show up fully in this charismatic essence you will experience a much more love-filled, happy life!
1) Passion – the most attractive woman is the woman who loves life and feels desirable. Men see this in your eyes ladies – that you “have it”. When you make yourself the priority and then the man you gain his interest and respect. As soon as you value the man more you lose your appeal because you are not honoring and respecting yourself first. So discover what you are passionate about and make a bliss list of at least five things. Make sure at least three of the things are not dependent on others for your “feel good” and then do one of these things daily to fill you up with passion.
2) Touch – becoming intimate with you is paramount to creating intimacy with others. So get started by experiencing your senses. Take some “me” time in a private environment (like your bedroom), light a candle, put on some music and lay down completely naked. Close your eyes and slowly touch every inch of your lovely body in a very sacred manner. As you run your hands over your legs, belly, breasts and arms notice the feel of your skin, the inner sensations, and the pleasure your body feels in being touched so lovingly. Appreciating your body in a non-sexual manner will help you get to know you and your sensual self.
3) Fun – connect with your other personas and let your inner vixen out! There are so many leading ladies waiting backstage to come out and play and bedazzle and yet we let the same ole’ gal take center stage day in and day out. Mix it up! Recast your movie! Take up belly dancing, pole dancing or whatever would make you just a wee bit uncomfortable and do it for YOU. Then bring her into the boudoir and create a fun romantic adventure. Your partner will be saying, “Wow who was that last night? Let’s invite her back!”
4) Flirt – flirt for the sheer pleasure of it, not to be coy or seductive but simply to have fun with all the elements of life. Feel the wind on your cheeks, coo at a baby, swish your favorite drink or morsel around letting your taste buds enliven, open up to situations you normally are closed off to, stand at the edge of the surf with your arms extended to the heavens, smile or say hello to a stranger and feel how expansive you become!
5) Moxie – become the most magnificent version of YOU- no more playing small and hiding out. One of my clients, Carol, was tired of the “room mate” relationship her marriage had become and decided to step into what she wanted. While taking one of my playful programs she tried out a few of the sensual poses she had learned. She didn’t let it bother her that she wasn’t getting the attention she wanted initially – instead she continued for her own pleasure and it was then that her husband locked eyes with her and they had the most passionate night in years. No coincidence that when she was confidently dwelling in the sweet spot of her magnificence she became irresistible!
6) Dance – again a private affair! You can do this one of two ways – either stand in front of a mirror and look at yourself or close your eyes and let the energy of the music come up through you, having its way with you. Do you trust yourself? Do you feel safe letting go of control? Give yourself permission to let go and let this energy fill you with sensual bliss within. Notice how you feel full and your edges start to disappear. A combination of the two is optimal, seeing the look in your eyes after you’ve allowed this energy to flow within is powerful.
7) Let go – this can be terrifying for sure but keeping the package all nice and neat and looking good is exhausting! Keeping everything together is also about being in control and that’s engaging your masculine. It’s very hard to be in your sensual feminine essence when you are fighting to keep your masculine present. Granted there is real authentic fear about letting go but understand that being in control is really an illusion. Be willing to see it another way. Feel the fear, listen in, and work through it rather than let it paralyze you. In other words surrender…God/Source/The Divine will be there to catch you and always get you through!
These tips are not a singular quick fix – they are a practice, a way of life. Make the commitment to make this way of living a lifestyle and you will find yourself feeling full up with your feminine, sensual self – engaging everyone in your wake.
PS – If you would like help filling up with your soulful sensual Self check out the Soul Sparkle Retreat! Join a small intimate group of like-minded women who are looking to do the exact same thing as you – and have FUN doing it! Soul Sparkle Retreat.
As we are in the month of love there is a promise, a hope a thought… this year is gonna be different. I’ve spoken to so many of you in the Sparkle Community ( many of you in relationships) who’ve said, “This is MY year to experience that deeply connected love I desire -it’s time and I deserve it!”
Yes you do!!! You ABSOLUTELY deserve to experience great love and the time has never been better than now – so stand up, draw an invisible line, step over it and claim it victoriously! Do it now!
Whether you’re looking or in a committed relationship it’s time to take bold action moving you towards your dream. If you are single I always say there’s a lid for every pot and if you have a lid, well you may just crave a better fit. Regardless, make a decision for your dream by implementing what I’m about to share with you today.
Hmmmm…are you beginning to notice any anxiety rising up? Twitching. Starting to sweat. Are you hearing yourself blurt out, “Not so fast!. As much as I want that, it’s a little bit scary. I don’t know if I can trust again…I’m not sure I’m ready to open my heart again…but dang I really want it! Ay yi yi what a conundrum!
If that speaks to you in any way, and you’re ready to let your desires zoom past your fears you’ll want to learn the 3-step process shared in the video below.
That’s why I’m writing to you today. Because all those doubts can disappear… forever.
Click the video below to learn more!
It’s my easy-to-implement “3 STEPS to make it safe to love again” video. I created it especially for you, because I’ve been where you are.
And I know that deep down you are longing to experience a love like no other.
By the time we’re done, you will have a key tool to succeed.
To set you free and help you feel safe to love again.
And steer you in the direction of the love you’ve missed out on all your life.
Now is your time! Leave behind the doubt, fear and paralysis that’s kept you hiding. A romantic adventurous and fulfilling love life is waiting for you!
Hallelujah it’s a brand new year lovelies! Fresh start. Big possibilities. Let’s dream!!
This month we’re going to be designing your most sparkling blueprint for the coming year – that means you’ll get a weekly article in the Sparkle community AND you’ll have the opportunity to listen to a call I’m hosting this week to help you soar into 2019!!!
So… do you have a clear vision yet for what you desire in 2019?
Could you describe it in detail right now or is it a bit fuzzy?
If you are like most people, you see bits and pieces of what you want to happen or you might be afraid to dream for fear of being disappointed, so it’s still a blank canvas.
Regardless, know that you can have the love-filled, FUN, joyful life you desire. All you have to do is get very specific about what you want and stay connected to that vision every day and voila you are making welcome the life you would love.
So, let’s get you crystal clear!!
Here are 3 key steps to clarity:
#1 – Ask yourself, “What do I really want? What would I love? What would my life look like if I were living as my most magnificent Self? What would life look like if I were living totally empowered?”
Would you have a deeply connected, loving and passionate relationship? How about letting that sensual, vibrant, healthy body come out to play? What about an exciting career that’s not only fulfilling but catapults you out of bed every morning with unbridled enthusiasm for the day? Is your bank account big and fat allowing you to travel to those bucket list places and have that magnificent Mediterranean home overlooking the ocean?
#2 – Give yourself permission to envision every area of your life as a 10 for a full spectrum SPARKLING life. What would that look like? The sky’s the limit! Think of every aspect of your life. Remember you can have it ALL – as far and wide and technicolor as your imagination can fathom.
#3 – Determine what you want, write it down (research shows you 10x manifestation by getting your thoughts out of your head and onto paper :)). Write it in first person present tense to direct the energy to the present moment. That’s how we close the gap from where we are to where we want to be. Be as detailed as possible. The law of specificity is one of the 3 most important invisible laws of success. The more specific you are the easier it will be to bring forth your vision.
How do you feel right now? Thrilled? Expansive? Excited? Inspired? Hopeful? Doubtful? Take some deep relaxing breaths and let yourself percolate. Let it sink in that you have control over the course of your life.
If you have felt like a buoy in the ocean bobbing about at the mercy of the waves, you now know you can anchor yourself with a clear vision of your choice (if some parts of the vision are still fuzzy, no worries. Let it come together organically as you lean into it and TRUST it will all come together)
So give yourself permission to dream…BIG! This is going to be your BEST YEAR EVVVVER lovely!!!!
This month, we’ve been celebrating independence with a series of posts aimed at helping you free yourself from limiting thoughts, beliefs, and behaviors so that you can move forward with clarity while inviting more love, joy, and fun into your life. I know this might sound counterintuitive, but one of the best ways you can create and nurture a sense of freedom for yourself, is by learning how to accept others exactly as they are.
Loosen Your Grip
It’s very common to want our loved ones, kids, friends, siblings even strangers to say things or behave in ways that we find acceptable and pleasing. However, having those expectations often sets us up for disappointment. If you think about it, what we are saying with this expectancy is, “you have to act this way in order for me to feel ok”. No wonder many of us are upset and frustrated much of the time – with this belief we give our power away, reliant on others to create our state of being. What an emotional roller coaster!
Growing up in a family where my brother was the golden child I got into this habit, very early on, in regards to my mother’s behavior towards me. If she said something sharp or gave me the silent treatment, my entire mood would change and I’d either become quiet and hurt or angry and explosive. I desperately wanted her to treat me with the love and kindness she showed my brother. This created years of conflict.
One day, my mom was upset about something that she refused to discuss. After several frustrating attempts to get her to share what was wrong, I went outside to get some fresh air and cool down. All of a sudden I was inspired to pray with a specific question that came into my mind: What would love do?
It was like I’d gotten this immediate download from God. At that moment, I was able to see and feel what was happening for my mother emotionally; her hurts and disappointments in life. That shift allowed me to stop making it about me and my pain and move into a deep compassion for my mom that filled my heart and soul. When I walked back into the house, not only had this experience shifted me,it had changed her too. She opened up and told me what had been bothering her, and we were finally able to connect. This was the first time EVER and it was the beginning of a beautiful new relationship with my mom.
Tips for Becoming More Accepting of Others
As soon as I started accepting my mom for who she is, no matter what her behavior towards me, our relationship began to evolve. So, the next time you find yourself in that rigid place, working to change or fix another person, I encourage you to use the following tips:
- Take three big breaths. If someone says something that upsets you, take three big breaths before you respond. Breathing interrupts your reactive patterning and calms your central nervous system allowing you to become more neutral and peaceful. This is always a better place to come from when responding 🙂
- Give the other person the benefit of the doubt. Most of the time, when we find ourselves getting angry, it’s because we think something is happening to us, but it’s far more likely that whatever is going on, has nothing to do with you and everything to do with the other person. Try creating a scenario. Maybe that person just got fired, or they found out their child is sick. Imagine as many possible scenarios as you can that have nothing to do with you.
- Bless the other person silently. When you bless somebody, what you’re doing is sending them love, which has the power to dissipate anger energy and allow you to approach the other person with compassion. You don’t need to do this out loud, focus your mind on the blessing and send that loving energy in the other person’s direction.
Remember to ask yourself, “What would love do?” and know that by accepting your friends, partners, and family members exactly as they are, you’re not only freeing yourself from unnecessary stress, but you’re also offering them the opportunity to be authentic and vulnerable with you, which can only benefit your relationship over the long term.
Happy New Year Dahhhhling!
We are entering into a new year – a fabulous time to dream, to blossom, to expand, to recommit to living as the Sparkling happy, fun-loving, successful (whatever that means to you) person you were born to be.
Typically this is a time to set resolutions – to make your goals. I’m going to go against the grain and invite you to forget about the ritualistic declaration of resolutions! Instead I challenge you to commit to living on the edge of your comfort zone.
You know why?
Because resolutions are ideals and without a plan it’s easy to get distracted, detoured, and drift. That can set into action some pretty brutal self-talk about not being able to get your act together to make it happen. And that leads to feeling bad about yourself. Not good!
But stepping outside your comfort zone…that involves taking ACTION! And no matter what the outcome, you can be proud of your bravery. That will build your confidence making you feel good about yourself.
And you know what?
Each step will move you closer to your dream. Voila! Pretty cool, right?
This idea of taking bold action is backed by some pretty amazing iconic females like Diane Feinstein who says the key to a happy and fulfilling life involves taking risks and stepping out of your safety zone.
She says that’s when life becomes magical and you are truly living into your genius and greatness.
As inspiring as that sounds you may be saying to yourself, “That seems kinda scary. My life may be a bit boring but routine suits me just fine – sure I may complain a bit but at least I know what to expect and I like being in control…” sound familiar?
In the spirit of this theme I am committed to speaking my truth – even if it’s a little risky -because I want to shake things up for you and nudge you in the direction of your bliss.
So here goes…living a routine life will suck your spirit dry! You’ll be parched, wilted, lifeless, dreamless with about as much energy as a sloth on a hot summer day. It’s time to follow your dreams and drink deeply from the well of the unknown. The excitement of the risk will make you feel vibrant and alive!
Now you might be thinking, “How does one do that?” Truth be told all it takes is an intention to make 2016 the year you live fully, a willingness to be open to new experiences, ready to receive all the good God wants you to have, and a commitment to bring forth consistent courage.
This means reflecting, identifying and overcoming those things that keep you in your rut. Then coming up with new behaviors and structures that are in alignment with who you want to become; the you that embraces life and all it’s opportunities; the you that is determined to look back at your life with no regrets.
Living your BEST year involves a commitment to a way of being. It’s realizing that life is full of choices and that we are each empowered to make choices that bring us the most joy, the most growth and the most fulfillment.
To get you started I want to share 3 powerful and energizing tips I learned about and took action on over the holidays.
Dear loveliness, when your relationship is on rocky ground it can bring about a boatload of anxiety, pain and panic. You may feel frozen or stuck, but believe it or not the upheaval is actually a wonderful invitation for growth – and when you journal, you can accelerate that growth.
If you are willing to see the situation as an opportunity to lean into your feelings and get curious instead of running from your emotions or denying they exist, you’ll gain a new perspective that will help you and your relationship shift.
Your feelings have something to say, so invite them in as though they are your best friends and have a tea party with them. Literally sit down with them, wrap them in love and listen – you will gain tremendous wisdom that will lead to your emotional freedom! And who doesn’t want that?!
I’ve experienced a lot of growth through journaling. I know it’s something that most people don’t do anymore, especially since we’re all so in love with our technology these days. But writing by hand causes different interactions in the brain.
Research highlights the hand’s unique relationship with the brain when it comes to composing thoughts and ideas. There’s also a greater sense of space when using a pen, allowing you to free flow and get it all out! Writing is, by nature, an opportunity for creativity and personal expression.
It’s the Best Therapy
Writing by hand is like free therapy – it brings emotional balance. All that it requires (other than a journal and something to write with) is that you create space and time for yourself.
Journaling can help you:
a. Define your emotions and what they mean for you
b. Release suppressed and conflicted feelings
c. Gain back clarity while being in the midst of overwhelming emotions.
Start by writing about something that’s really upsetting you. As you write about it, you’re able to openly explore and unravel the problem.
This helps you get to the heart of the matter. And it’s amazing how often the upset isn’t what you thought but instead a completely surprising “aha”! I can’t tell you how many times that happened for me – always eye-opening!
The process of journaling helps you manage your emotions and brings you into balance. How awesome is that, right? You receive new insights and perspectives as well as a lot of peace! Joyous Jingles!!
Buy a Journal That You’re Drawn To
Your journal is like your new best friend. Each page breathlessly awaits your every thought – loves, supports and adores you. No judgment. No criticism.
You’re going to be spending a lot of time with your lovely journal so you should like the way it looks. Choose something you love – that you’re drawn to; that feels good in your hands! Put it by the bedside and dedicate a certain time every day to sit down and write. Light a candle, put on music, make it like a ritual. After some time, it will become just like brushing your teeth!
The pain you feel now is temporary, dear heart, and I’d love to guide you through it. Click HERE to set up a time to chat.
Who do you want to become?
In the movie version of your life, are you the Leading Lady you always thought you would be? Are you living the life you want? Or are you stuck in the wings, afraid to step out and into the spotlight and own your divine power in this world?
God, the divine, a higher power…whatever you believe in, intended you to live an empowered existence, and to experience life in the highest and happiest way possible.
If you are sitting reading this thinking… YES! I am so NOT living my life to the fullest, or owning my Leading Lady life, then stay with me, because making the change from hiding in the wings to standing in your personal sparkling spotlight is easier than you think honeychild!
What does it take to be a Leading Lady?
Well look no further than Hollywood “A” list stars for examples. What do they have in common? They exude confidence and self-assurance, its clear that they love and respect themselves and those around them. There’s this magnetic energy that surrounds them and draws you in, that’s why their movies and red carpet events get so much attention!
Here’s how to start the journey to becoming your own sparkly Leading Lady.
First, write down the characteristics of your ultimate leading lady.
~ How does she think?
~ How does she dress?
~ How does she talk?
~ How does she react to situations
~ How does she show up in life?
Then Do This:
- Find a picture of a role model that represents your Leading Lady ideals (can be an actress, or politician, an activist , a friend or anyone that embodies your list of characteristics listed above) and post that in a very conspicuous place. Remember that you want to see this multiple times a day so don’t put it on the back of your closet door unless that’s somewhere you go often!
- Write the characteristics of your Leading Lady on paper and post it on your fridge or wall in your bedroom next to the pictures of you role model.
- Visit this Leading Lady vision board OFTEN, a minimum of twice a day and stick to it!
To become your Leading Lady you need to take her characteristics and create images with them. Our brain associates with pictures more readily than words, so here’s where you can be creative and build an image with yourself in it firmly anchored in those traits OR find photo’s that represent them.
You can create your own Leading Lady vision board if you want! Once you create the images connect with them, FEEL them, engage the senses. Do this consistently twice a day and watch your new sparkling self-image spring to life.
By holding the image and characteristics of the Leading Lady you want to be in your mind several times a day, you are introducing what I call ‘The Magic of a Good Attitude’ into your life. If your Leading Lady characteristics say that your role model has great posture and her house is tidy and she spends at least a few hours a week taking care of herself so she can take care of others, then you will feel compelled to sit up straighter, do those dishes and book that mani pedi next week!
Write down the characteristics of the woman you want to become, connect with it, own it and you will soon see your outer world changing in ways that confirm you have become her! It sounds simple but its really just about creating a different self-image and attitude.
I talk about being your Leading Lady in my book Sexy and Sparkling After 40, in a chapter I call ‘Adjust your Attitude’ that is super helpful for this. You can get your copy here
As a 21st century woman, you are busy and life can feel hectic. We are hardworking women and we’re all moving so fast rushing from one thing to the next. But, whew! It’s exhausting and stressful.
Could it be that we’ve become too busy?
When we move at this break neck pace, it causes us to lose touch with something special: our pleasure and sensuality. We forget to savor, enjoy, and really experience the best parts of life.
As one of the hosts for the radio show, Loving Your Sensual Side, I recently interviewed my friend and colleague Deonesea La Fey on how a woman can live in her sensuality in day to day life.
Get ready to turn up your enjoyment factor! ==> Listen to Deonesea’s interview now
In this interview Deonesea delivers critical tips to interrupt the patterns we have that keep us stressed so we can consciously choose more pleasure, joy & sensuality.
This interview is not to be missed!
Click here to access the replay page ==> Live in Sensuality Day to Day
Are you ready to enjoy life and break free from stress? Great! Here is an action step you can do right now! Contact me to schedule a complimentary sensuality and joy strategy session.
You’ve got a dream, a goal, ambition and you’re ready to take the world by storm. Woo hoo!
But, wait, why are there so many darn obstacles on the way to your goal?
Anyone who’s dared to dream knows that the initial excitement will eventually be met with some form of obstacle or resistance. So, how do you move past these roadblocks on the path to your dream?
Click here to read the full blog article and learn how to overcome the obstacles to your dreams.