Is self-love selfish?

If your upbringing was anything like mine, you were probably taught not to be selfish. So when you hear all this talk about self-love, you might wonder: is loving myself selfish?

Selfishness is defined as “being concerned excessively or exclusively, for oneself or one’s own advantage, pleasure, or welfare, regardless of others.” When someone is acting selfishly, they will pursue their own welfare even at the expense of others.

Self-love, on the other hand, means that you develop a higher regard for yourself and your well-being. You take care of yourself and your needs, but it does not come at the cost of others. Practicing self-love can actually put you in a position to help other people more. When you take the time to “fill your cup,” you will have more to give to others. You cannot give what you do not have.

Self-love is NOT selfish.

So what does self-love look like?

  • Being kind to yourself and speaking kindly about yourself.
  • Showing yourself grace and forgiving yourself.
  • Setting healthy boundaries.
  • Taking care of your mind, body, and spirit.
  • Making time to do the things that are important to you, that make you feel happy and rejuvenated.
  • Being proud of who you are and comfortable in your own skin.
  • And so much more!

Treat yourself as you would like others to treat you.

Are you ready to start loving yourself more?

Join my free 5-Day Self-Love Challenge. Each morning you will receive an email directing you to the LIVE Facebook training giving you an activity that you can do in 5 minutes. These activities are designed to build your self-confidence, self-esteem, SELF-LOVE and make you feel GOOD.

I hope to see you next week for the 5-Day Self-Love Challenge. I can’t wait for your miraculous transformation.

Sparkling Love,

PS – The 5-Day Self-Love Challenge starts on June 21st at 11 am PST. Learn the proven success strategies & action steps that will transform your relationship with yourself & help you build better relationships with others in as little as 5 minutes a day. Click here to join for free.

The Self-Love Challenge with Sherri Nickols

Whether your life feels stable or wobbly right now, is there some area that you desire more?

Would you love to be in a romantic relationship OR do you crave a richer more intimate bonding with your current partner? Do you want a more fulfilling career, more money, deeper spiritual connection?

Or maybe you’re like many of the women I have the privilege of chatting with and supporting – super successful in their careers, but covering up their inner struggle with self-doubt and low self-worth by being high achievers. Ultimately leaving them with a sense of disconnection and loneliness.

My invitation for you is the one thing that changes everything…and that is …to allow self-love. When you remember who you really are, abundance flows because you show up differently and look at life differently – feeling full rather than lacking – and that shifts it all.

So…..I am inviting you into a fun and FREE 5-day Self-Love Summer Challenge where I will email you each morning with an activity that can be done in only 5 minutes. The activities are designed to build your self-confidence, self-esteem, self-love and make you feel GOOD.


June 21st, 2021 to June 25th, 2021

How it Works:

1. Register for the challenge

2. Join our private Facebook group created exclusively for the 5-Day Self-Love Challenge

3. Each morning you will receive an email directing you to the LIVE Facebook training giving you an activity that can be done within 5 minutes

Why join the challenge:

1. You will learn the proven success strategies and action steps that will transform your relationship with yourself and help you build better relationships with others.

2. You will feel more confident, happy, and empowered.

3. You will discover healthier habits to gain fulfillment, build resilience, and increase joy!

I can’t wait for your miraculous self-love expansion! I hope to see you next week!

Sparkling love,


Build Self-Love in Only 5 Minutes a Day

“How could I let this happen?”, I thought, as I stood on the scale realizing that I weighed almost 40lbs more than my ideal weight. I felt a sick pain in the pit of my stomach and I didn’t know if it was the pizza talking, or if it was because I was so disgusted with myself.

I had been in denial for a long time; wearing baggy clothes and avoiding the scale. It was time to face the fact that I was an emotional eater. When I was stressed out, I ate. When I was angry, I ate. When I was sad, I ate.

Can you relate?

It started in Junior High School. While I enjoyed being active, my best friend did not. Many days after school we would bake brownies or go to the deli and order mile-high turkey sandwiches. Needless to say, it didn’t take very long before I began eating beyond my hunger and it had become a habit.

I had bought into fad diets, thinking that I could do it on my own but nothing seemed to work. (I’m embarrassed to admit this included a one-week diet consisting of one thing: German chocolate cake!! I know….horrifying! Although I lost 10 lbs lordy was I ever disconnected from Self Love! I look back now and think how in the world could I have thought that was nourishing for my mind and body!!! ).

Eventually, I sought out the help of a mindset/behavioral coach, who helped me discover that I was trying to fill an emotional void with food. There were a lot of things in my life at that time that I could not control. The one thing that I could control was what I ate. In a twisted and obviously unhealthy way, eating felt empowering.

As a Spiritual/Transformation Coach, I am able to support the women I work with in increasing their self-love, reframing their thoughts, finding empowering activities to replace self-sabotaging behaviors, and develop their feeling of worthiness as it applies to every aspect of their life. Not only their weight but their whole Being!

Everyone deserves to live a life filled with love and loving connections.
So how can we intentionally create and experience more love?

How can we wake up without that feeling that a cloud is over us? … How can we be filled with happiness each morning jumping out of bed excited about our day?

In order to experience more love, first and foremost, you need to embody self-love. Living in this vibration will help you create new results in your life. Easy, right? 😉

How can you get into the vibration of self-love?

I am inviting you into a fun and FREE 5-day Self-Love Challenge where I will email you each morning with an activity that can be done in only 5 minutes. These activities are designed to build your self-confidence, self-esteem, self-love and make you feel GOOD.

1. You will learn the proven success strategies and action steps that will transform your relationship with yourself and help you build better relationships with others.

2. You will feel more confident, happy, and empowered.

3. You will discover healthier habits to gain fulfillment, build resilience, and increase joy

What are other women saying about the Self-Love Challenge?


“For the last few years I have struggled with anxiety and depression. It seems like so many bad things were happening in my life…mom, dad, and sister each had cancer, lost my job, my marriage was rapidly declining, etc.

When this year started I was already deep into another emotional meltdown. I realized that I had to make a change, for myself, for my daughter, my marriage, all of my relationships.

This challenge has helped. I have been up and down still, but the lows aren’t as low anymore and there is pure joy more often. I plan on doing everything I can to keep this trajectory headed in the right direction. I am worth it. Thank you Sherri for all of your help and support. God knew I needed some more hot pink in my life.” 

~ Ingrid Sousa



I can’t wait for your miraculous self-love expansion!

Sparkling love,


PS – Build your Self-Love in only 5 minutes a day with my free Self-Love Challenge. Learn more and sign up here.


PPS – Do you already know that the Challenge will be better if you can go through it with people who know you, value you and support you? Invite them to join the Challenge too so that you have people who will celebrate your new learnings and ideas and will hold you accountable after the Challenge is complete.

Are you the leading lady of your life?

Are you the leading lady of your life? You absolutely should be, but so often, women find themselves acting as the understudy, afraid or unconditioned to step into their greatness, living their life for others, and letting labels like “being a good mom, wife, daughter, sister, friend” define their role in life.

Alternatively, when you embrace your role as the leading lady, you stop living an externalized life and let go of seeking outside validation…A miraculous thing happens when you choose to source your power from within…(where your real power lay by the way – I call it your Diamond Power) and embody your True Essence…you garner gumption, self-respect, and confidence.

Living as a leading lady, as opposed to an understudy, largely depends on your attitude. To think and act like a leading lady, you must master your mindset.

4 Steps to Keep Your Mindset Focused in a Positive Direction That Supports Your Authentic Self:

1. Start each morning by making the conscious decision to approach the day with inner strength and confidence in your abilities.

2. Set your intention to hold life-affirming thoughts all day because they will lead you to your highest good.

3. Create a vision for the day. Visualize yourself responding to life with ease and grace and receiving abundant blessings.

4. Be aware of your thoughts. When you notice them wandering into the dark, reel them back into the light.

Now is the time to explore and expand without judgment! Let your leading lady shine and take control of your story.

If you want to learn more about adjusting your attitude and embodying the leading lady persona, there is a whole chapter dedicated to it in my free ebook Sexy and Sparkling After 40.

I challenge you to get curious and flush out the various unique facets of your leading lady!

Sparkling Love,

See Your Bright Future

If you knew that anything was possible and you were guaranteed to succeed, what would you do?


If you are like most people, you might see bits and pieces of what you want to happen, or you might be afraid to dream for fear of being disappointed, so the vision of your future is just a blank canvas.

If your future is fuzzy or non-existent, you probably are experiencing life without direction. You may feel stuck, stagnant, unhappy, and disillusioned.

Has your life turned out the way you thought it would?

If not, are you focusing all your energy on what went wrong, or are you creating a brilliant, bright future?

Now is the time to see your bright future!

You can have the love-filled, exciting, happy life you desire. All you have to do is get very specific about what you want and stay connected to that vision every day.

Here are 3 key steps to seeing your bright future with clarity:


#1 – Ask yourself, “What do I really want? What would I love? What would my life look like if I were living as my most magnificent Self? What would life look like if I were living totally empowered?”

Would you have a deeply connected, loving, and passionate relationship? How about letting that sensual, vibrant, healthy body come out to play? What about an exciting career that’s not only fulfilling but catapults you out of bed every morning with unbridled enthusiasm for the day? Is your bank account big and fat allowing you to travel to those bucket list places and have that magnificent Mediterranean home overlooking the ocean?

#2 – Give yourself permission to envision every area of your life as a 10. What would that look like? The sky’s the limit! Think of every aspect of your life. Remember, you can have it ALL – as far and wide as your imagination can fathom.


#3 – Determine what you want, write it down (research shows you 10x manifestation by getting your thoughts out of your head and onto paper). Write it in first person present tense to direct the energy to the present moment. That’s how we close the gap from where we are to where we want to be. Be as detailed as possible. The law of specificity is one of the three most important invisible laws of success. The more specific you are, the easier it will be to bring forth your vision.


How do you feel right now? Thrilled? Expansive? Excited? Inspired? Hopeful? Doubtful? Take some deep relaxing breaths and let yourself percolate. Let it sink in that you have control over your life.


If you have felt like a buoy in the ocean bobbing about at the mercy of the waves, you now know you can anchor yourself with a clear vision of your choice (if some parts of the vision are still fuzzy, no worries. Let it come together organically as you lean into it and TRUST it will come together)


Here’s to stepping into the most magnificent version of you – because there is no time like the present!


Give yourself permission to dream…BIG!

Sparkling Love,


PS – Are you ready to take control of your future? My book, Sexy and Sparkling After 40, gives you 7 proven steps to revitalize your radiance that will empower you to design your life. Get a free e-copy here.

PPS  Need help designing your dream? Sign-up for a free strategy session with me at


This one thing will make 2021 yours!

Just about time to say sayonara to 2020! I think we can all agree this year, like no other, brought many changes. Opportunities for shifts in our relationships, careers, behavior, health and interactions with each other in our societal structures.

The term “20/20” has been known to symbolize perfect vision and although it may not seem like it’s been a year of perfect vision, it’s definitely been a course correction… seemingly a wake up call on so many levels to get us  a Truer vision. 

Hopefully you can now step into the New Year more connected to what’s true for you, for others and the planet.

There’s been a lot of living outside your comfort zone this year and one thing I know for sure is that if you really want to see meaningful change in 2021, you’ll want to continue cleaning and cleansing those things that you mistakenly believe are keeping you safe, but are actually holding you back. Three things in particular that I’ll guide you to release later in this article… do yourself a favor and LET THEM GO!!! This will not only build your confidence it will bring happiness.

A few years back I remember seeing Dianne Feinstein and a bevy of other iconic females being interviewed and they all said the key to  a happy and fulfilling life involves taking risks, releasing what doesn’t work, clearing your space and stepping our of your safety zone.

According to these empowered women, that’s when life becomes magical and you are truly living into your genius and greatness.

As inspiring as that sounds you may be saying to yourself, “That seems kinda scary. Uncertainty worries me… I’m a bit co-dependent and I like being in control…” but if this year has taught us anything it’s that we don’t have control over others or outside circumstances. We do, however, have control over how we respond to others and our circumstances – that’s our point of power and empowerment! And it requires a clean out!

In the spirit of this theme I say stop looking in the rear view mirror baby!!! Trust that God has something so amazing for you, waiting for you, it will blow your mind. But you’ve got to do some cleaning and take the leap!

Clinging to what you know may feel safe, but it will suck your spirit dry! You’ll be parched, wilted, lifeless, dreamless with about as much energy as a sloth on a hot summer day. There’s no room for expansion and expansion is what makes you FEEL ALIVE!! It’s time to follow your dreams and drink deeply form the well of the unknown.

Now you might be thinking, “How does one do that?” Truth be told all it takes is an intention to make 2021 the year you live fully, a willingness to be open to a new opportunities, new ways of thinking, new experiences, and a commitment to bring forth consistent courage.

This means reflecting, identifying and overcoming those things that not only keep you in your rut but didn’t work out in 2020. Then coming up with new behaviors and structures that are in alignment with who you want to become; the you that embraces life and all its opportunities; the you that is determined to look back at your life with no regrets.

Here’s a exercise to get you started. Go ahead and grab 3 pieces of paper and a pen and begin writing:

1. Page #1 – write down all the relationships you either want to release and/or set new boundaries. Set the intention you only want to have joyful and happy relationships. Send love to those you are releasing and then burn the list in a safe place like your fireplace.
2. Page #2 – write down all the physical stuff you don’t want to bring into 2020 – items that take up space and keep you attached to the past. Next take action to clear it out. That may mean pictures that remind you of relationships that went south, clothing that no longer fits or makes you feel good, paperwork and clutter! Move it out and move it forward beautiful!
3. Page #3 – list the emotional things or habits/patterns you don’t want to bring into 2021 – this can be old limiting patterns that don’t serve you anymore or emotional habits like guilt, shame, blame, avoidance, anger, sadness. It might be obligations, or unhealthy habits. I personally am choosing to release a pattern of playing it safe, of being judged – in the New Year I want to be more vulnerable and reach/impact more people! I’m committed to sharing more of my life experiences to inspire others. What emotions or patterns are you willing to release?

Doing this clearing and cleansing exercise will make you feel lighter, clear and more confident. As you feel more confident you’ll be more willing to take risks. Voila! You are now living into your potential…

Here’s to you living on the edge of your comfort zone to experience your greatest and most magnificent Self!! Toasting you and your courage!!!

Sparkling Love,


With faith, miracles will happen

Would you love to see a miracle in your life? Maybe in your love life…or career…or health…or your finances…?

If this is speaking to you know, without a shadow of a doubt — it’s possible!!! All you have to do is believe…

Today I’m bringing you a powerful conversation I had with Gen Stoney, an incredibly strong, brave woman who overcame being a victim of sexual trauma and an addiction to alcohol.

Growing up, Gen struggled with learning, and that led to self-hatred. And drinking allowed her to escape the chatter in her brain like nothing else.

Drinking allowed her to feel like she could be herself. But it came at a price. The drinking led her to the strip club, which is where she had her first sexual trauma. After a second rape, she told herself that she was going to prevent something like that from ever happening again.

But rather than embrace self-love, she drank more. She had to get over trauma in her life, but she didn’t know how. After ending up in a psych ward for attempted suicide, she hit rock bottom. But what really helped her was that she met a man who she didn’t want to drink around. It was incredibly hard to avoid drinking, but she was determined, and wanted to stop.

Eventually they got married. However, things didn’t get easy after that. He started having an affair, and Gen was crushed. That was when the miracle happened…


Sparkling Love,

Did you know that this was so magical?

The magic of music…

Music can take us from sad to sensual to happy and feeling vibrantly ALIVE!! Soft jazz or blues can help us wind down after a stressful day and you probably have a favorite song that immediately lifts your spirits and makes you smile!

So, it may be no surprise to learn that music has big-time physiological benefits.
When we hear music that makes us want to dance, our brains release dopamine, and we start to feel a natural high.

But did you know that music has the power to heal?

You can heal your body and mind with Sound Baths — the vibrational waves can wash away stress and anxiety.
Sound bath healing has been around for thousands of years…used by the Greeks, Egyptians, and Native Americans as an ancient form of deep meditation. Through crystal bowls, cymbals, gongs and tuning forks ambient repetitive sounds at different frequencies help enhance and guide you through your meditative experience.

This is what sound baths will do for YOU:
• Calm your body and mind.
• Can help reduce stress and anxiety.
• Can help Increase focus and clarity.
• Boosts your mood
• Improves sleep.
• Elevates feelings of spiritual and emotional well-being.

I want to invite you to experience an amazing Sound Bath for yourself!

Join me November 6th through the 8th for a virtual girls weekend to experience a Sound Bath Healing plus more!

On the first day, you will be guided by someone I’ve hand-picked to take you through an activation of your Diamond Self, which will be a deep hypnotic visualization followed by a powerful Sound Bath. This is an epic journey inward that will open you in ways you can’t imagine preparing you to release all that no longer serves you.

You do NOT want to miss it!!

CLICK HERE to sign up for early bird pricing!

This virtual Soul Sparkle Retreat will be a spiritual self-love adventure!
Here are some nourishing experiences created and waiting for you:

  • Radiant Stretch and Gentle Yoga to open and awaken the body.
    Shamanic Fire Releasing Ceremony and Intention Setting Ceremony (with Candles) to let go of what no longer serves you (including any thoughts, fears, anxieties about COVID and the political climate)
    Dare to be Desirable masterclass to awaken your feminine essence learning body language techniques that create an inviting allure
    The Singing Field sacred experience exploring the incredible wisdom and authenticity of our ‘naked’ voice.
    Holy Love teachings by yours truly

CLICK HERE TO CHECK IT OUT And Get the Early Bird Pricing!!!
Or email me today at to book your spot!!
I look forward to seeing YOU in this radiant retreat!

Sparkling Love,

Use These Quantum Healing Techniques For Energy

It is natural to try to ignore our inner voice especially when it comes to our health. However, your inner voice acts as a powerful GPS to guide the decisions you make—whether that’s following the internal nudges to ditch your job or just knowing when you need more sleep in your life. Ignoring it can be detrimental to your health.

By listening to your inner voice and using quantum healing techniques, you may be able to reverse decades of pain and discomfort that is making your life difficult.

Kavita suffered from headaches from the time she was 20. She explains that at that time, she had a boyfriend who was not Indian, which upset her traditional Indian parents. As a result of this rift, she developed sinus infections and a part of her body seemingly just shut down. Those negative emotions remained stuck inside her for years, causing problems in her body.

In this interview with Kavita, she shares the miracle that allowed her to start healing trauma through meditation. She listened to her inner voice and used quantum healing techniques to reverse decades of pain that was stopping her from moving forward in her life.

Healing trauma from your past can be a lifelong challenge. However, with quantum healing techniques and the wisdom of her own body, Kavita was able to experience a transformational miracle.

Click the link to watch the video and find out how Kavita was finally able to relieve herself from the pain in her life.

Sparkling Love,

She Went From Orphanage To Millionaire

There is a quote by Robert Schuller that says, “Tough times never last, but tough people do”.

Maybe you have had a tough time and you feel that finding success is a secret that everyone else knows about but you.

Best-selling author Magie Cook has a secret to success. She has lived an extraordinary life. From humble beginnings growing up in an Orphanage and fighting adversity inside her own adopted family to millionaire business woman after she was presented the opportunity to sell her salsa in Walmart Stores.

She is living proof that it doesn’t matter where you come from — you can do anything that you set your mind to.

How did she do it?

In my interview with Magie, she shares with us the secret of how she got her salsa in Walmart Stores, and she gives us her 3 R’s of highly successful people.

You don’t want to miss this one!

Sparkling Love,

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