Last month, we began looking at charisma, that divine sparkle that makes us irresistible to others and acts as a powerful magnet to attract more love, joy, and fun into our lives! In my last post, Why You Should Stop Comparing Yourself to Others, I explained how comparing yourself can zap your self-confidence and leave you feeling disconnected from your charismatic nature. But comparison isn’t the only trap that gets us.
For many of us, the way we lose the connection to our charisma is by caring way too much about what other people think. When you get caught up in other peoples’ opinions, you abandon yourself and create an imbalance in your soul, making it impossible for your charisma to shine through.
Why Do We Care So Much About What Other People Think?
Tens of thousands of years ago, when humans were living in hunter-gatherer societies, what other people thought often meant the difference between being embraced and cared for or shunned and abandoned.
The desire to be accepted is deeply rooted in our survival patterns, so it makes sense that we sometimes worry we’re flawed, not good enough or people please to be liked/loved. But here’s the thing: that survival pattern doesn’t hold up in today’s society. It’s time to let go of that anxiety, embrace a higher way of thinking, and build up your inner validation of Self.
You Can’t Change What Other People Think
In last month’s post, Free Yourself by Becoming More Accepting of Others, I wrote that when you try to make other people conform to your rigid expectations, you communicate the belief that you’re not OK unless they change their behavior. Working to convince someone to believe something different about you communicates the same idea.
Several years ago, I found myself in a very tough situation with my sisters. They had specific ideas about my character that weren’t based in any truth. It was very painful and hurtful. I quickly realized nothing I could say would convince them otherwise. And ultimately I saw this was an opportunity for me to gain more solid state in the truth – that God knows who I am, and that is most important. That gave me great inner peace and allowed me to let go of trying to “prove” myself to my sisters. What I learned was the more I connected with my Diamond Power (the power that breathes me) and spent time increasing my self love, the less it mattered what they thought of me and that set me free.
How to Dial Down the Fear of What Other People Think
If you find yourself heading into an anxious space, worrying about what someone has said about you, or working overtime to change their opinion, try one of the following tools:
- Breathe! Trust me; breathing is a panacea for just about everything. Take a few deep breaths to center yourself – this will interrupt the thought pattern that is occurring and bring you back to peace.
- Remind yourself that you are a child of God. You are whole, and it doesn’t matter what anyone else says. You are unconditionally loved – wholey and fully.
- Tune into your vision of the woman you are and want to be. Ask yourself, “What is the truth of me? What is essential to my nature?” BE heard.
- Ask yourself if what others are saying is true? First ask yourself, is this true? If it doesn’t feel right don’t accept it as true. Let it go and understand everyone has their own perspective. On the other hand, if what the other person is saying has some validity, don’t judge or blame yourself, simply ask yourself what you can do to turn things around.
Using any one of these tools will help you to create a space for self-love and self-acceptance, which will ultimately make other peoples’ opinions irrelevant, clear the sludge off the diamond, and allow you to be in your authentic, beautiful, charismatic state.
PS It’s not too late to join the Love Summit 2: Find It, Feel It and Live It Forever! Join me and 20+ experts and learn how to attract & maintain more LOVE and joy. CLICK HERE to join!